Updates! Reviews! Contest! Yay!
Updates! Mark your calendars and grab a chair, ‘cuz we have boatloads of assailant-neutralizing goodness headed your way!
Hello, my adoring public! It’s the Holiday season and I’ve been buried under mountains of work, and I apologize for the delay of an update. Things are going well on the OC front: tests to run, articles to write and faces to decontaminate thanks to a wide variety of products to test at my disposal. Things are so good, in fact, that we’re expanding our horizons a bit by including other product reviews!
In addition to self-defense sprays and the like, we’ll cover ECWs as well for a convenient means of pest deterrence for cyclists, joggers and people who don’t enjoy getting hurt in general. On the slate to be posted first we have:
– Kubotan: A metal rod meant to be held in your fist and used to manipulate pressure points and joints, give the user a “loaded fist” (like having a roll of quarters in your hand) and (when sporting a tapered end) affords the ability to use it like an icepick in a hammer-fist blow. Can arguably be used lethally if necessary.
– Stun Gun: A gun/handheld device that shocks attackers.
– Stun Baton: A baton/nightstick that shocks attackers while bludgeoning their asses. A personal favorite, the telescoping design that folds down to ~6″ is as easy to carry in a pocket as a Magnum-sized OC canister and augments your fighting ability considerably.
– Dog Deterrents : Engineered to spot, but not blind or excessively hurt, vicious dogs and predators. The levels of OC are typically significantly lower than people-oriented stuff as the pest needs only to flee once exposed and in pain, not to be subdued like a criminal. Mace, Dog-B-Gone and a handful of other brands use a 10% concentration of citronella oil to confuse and disorient the dog, as the olfactory system of canines is their primary sense and the oil flutters them enough to tuck tail and run away until they can “see” again (about 15 minutes).
I’m highly skeptical of such sprays, as a mean dog who’s absolutely devoted to munching on your femur is unlikely to back off if he’s already within biting range and the spray merely puzzles him as he tears my face from my facial area. As of this very moment I wouldn’t trust anything less than OC on a feral pup, though I think it would be much less cruel to use something like the OC-17 Police Magnum fogger instead of Fox 5.3- the skin-penetrant properties of 5.3 aren’t going to do much to deter an angry animal due to the fur coat it has, and the much cheaper OC-17 formula is damned hot, about 1/4 the price of Fox and thus cheaper and more effective when it comes to this particular niche situation.
The extendable stun baton from Streetwise is a small unit that packs 8,000,000 volts of electricity with the entire tip and shaft (heh heh) blazing with current-carrying metal contacts plus a standard two-prong arcing tip. It’s less than 6″ long and easily hidden (HEH HEH HEH), requiring only a flick of the wrist to extend and lock it then a push of a button to make it shriek with the ear-splitting cracking of the electrical arc prod on the end. So already we’re working with a collapsible baton that is used like, well, a baton (you beat people with it, you really ought to know this by now…) with the added benefit of eight millions volts delivered to the target with each blow- even a simply poke in the chest will give their body a Charlie horse it won’t soon forget. Oh, and it has a wrist strap that disables the unit entirely if removed by your assailant. That alone could help save your life!
Fox Labs was (and is) a seriously tough OC spray that’s night impossible to be within ten feet of a and upon testing and analyzing the results and data of the “Five Point Three” line of products, the unholy power in the little black cans became immediately clear: this stuff is the nastiest OC-only (no added CS) spray available, though there are certainly other brands with similar characteristics (not naming names… yet).
The propellant blasts it out of the can with the fury of a F-5 tornado touching down in a NASCAR race, surely powerful enough to get all up in their face like the backhand of a cruel pimp. I coughed, wheezed, felt my brain running out of my nose and tears down my face after I gave a very light half-second shot to the aforementioned Big Gulp cup, making it impossible to stand within ten feet of that orange hell and speak more than two syllables without coughing like a plague victim and crying tears of pure agony. My uncle, the cameraman for the shot, has some health problems (lungs of a smoker, COPD, etc.) and instantly had to back off from the hot zone and wait 10-15 minutes for the pungency to settle down so he could film my wheezing face without, you know, dying. I’ll put it like this: Getting hit with the Fox 5.3 is not pepper oil pain, it’s a caustic chemical burn, and a damn potent one at that. Makes most cheaper sprays feel like a mist of steam. So much to tell I think a video series is in order!
Sabre has proven that they’re among the best when it comes to both quality products and customer support over the past few weeks, and I’m unbelievably eager to work with them and test their stuff. I do have some typos and slightly inaccurate numbers to fix on the Sabre 3-in-1 article, and I’ll do that, but my mind is racing about what Sabre (Security Equipment Corporation, to be full and proper) formulas and delivery systems can do. Their 9 oz home defense unit with pistol grip- by most accounts and my own silly speculation given their track record thus far- might be precisely what cyclists, motorists and anyone who doesn’t like being assaulted need in a spray. Sporting a range of 30 feet with either a sticky foam or cone fog spray pattern, using the infamous Red mixture, easily attached to a bicycle or set next to a bed, and capable of deterring just about anything at respectable distance. Yikes!
The Sabre reliability and line of affordable yet extremely potent defense products has kicked metric ass-tons of ass from the start and has been the brand I have personally carried since my first little OC keychain canister was purchased years ago, and now that I know what they are like as a company it’s natural to say “do yourself a favor- stick with the Sabre!” when asked about a widely-available can of no-no-no for general use. Their stun guns are also incredibly impressive, much more than I would normally expect from a business devoted to OC sprays, foams and gels, and (as mentioned earlier) a handful of electrical defense tool reviews has become necessary. So, I hope the Sabre Stun Shock Stick Series delivers the performance they’re already renowned for.
In keeping with the idea of covering other self-defense tools like stun guns, tasers, kubotans, lead-weighted cap/gloves and a plethora of “BZZT-PSSST” items we’re hoping to give the Sabre line of stun guns and (maybe) batons a good look since they’re inexpensive and the next best companion to pepper spray next to a .45 pistol. Obviously, hot sauce from hell is the main focus of S.E.C. and their ECWs (Electronic Compliance Weapon) are sort of the new kid on the block: it has to prove itself against the current market where companies like Tazer, Streetwise, and Guard Dog have developed, refined and improved over decades of real-world use by civilians and authorities alike.
Aerko: what can I say? Freeze (and the +P variant with CS tear gas in the mix), Punch and Clear-Out gas grenades are the de facto industry standard when used by correctional officers as decades of proven reliability and with every single unit formulated, filled, labelled, capped and handled in Florida by some of the nicest, most knowledgeable people I have ever met in the OC circles using only all-American parts, ingredients and labor. These guys and gals have made a GREAT impression on me and are dedicated to consistency, flawless QC and customer satisfaction- thus, they’re getting a post all to themselves that I’ll release and append to the Freeze +P piece.
Streetwise: Oh man. This stuff is serious, and their stun batons are likely the best one can currently (heh heh, pun) get, packing well over 4,000,000 volts of compliance-aiding amperage. Testing their classic OC inventory will unarguably end up with at least one person dunking their head in multiple buckets of water. Testing their baton will make someone feel like a broken power transformer, and that is what I’m most amped (another pun!) about from these dudes. The expandable stun baton sounds like the dream of a cyclist or CO as it provides a LOT of power in a small, collapsible package, and when used in tandem with their “18%” (civilian-grade) spray a very quick end to conflict can reasonably be expected. They have a LEO-only line of 23% concentration, but that’s for police use, so reviewing it could be a fun exercise in masochism if I can manage to get my paws on some. Said to be the best batons on earth, claimed by many as the top choice for defense sprays and staffed by very friendly, affable and helpful folks. Stoked on it, son! Hopefully I don’t poop myself when getting a jolt in the arm! Seriously, it happens. Ugh.
Here’s what’s coming down the pipe in the two weeks:
Sabre Red – Sabre! Proven! Incredible! Now to show y’all why it’s the most popular consumer brand of the pain-spray variety!
Fox Labs 5.3 – Good lord. GOOD. LORD. Coming sooner than most others because while I carry, use and review OC sprays regularly, I firmly regard this stuff as my own chemical weapon. It can burn leather, give 2nd-degree burns upon exposure complete with peeling all the skin off a face, and has yet to fail in taking a man down as fast as possible. It is way more complicated in formulation than peppers and oil. It is legendary.
Fox Labs Mean Green – The Fox heat with a bright green dye to mark the attacker for 48 hours.
Freeze +P – The original OC/CS powerhouse. We may test the Clear-Out grenades, pending further review.
Punch 3 Foam (Mk. III unit) – Foamy OC that sticks to faces and doesn’t blow right back in your face. Infamous stuff- Google it.
Streetwise – 18% and (hopefully, fingers crossed, praying for) their line of stun guns and batons.
Alright you insane internet avatars, listen up: I’m holding a contest and subsequently giving away various sprays and prizes. What’s the contest? YOU TELL ME! Shall we go “who shared the site the most on FB” or stick with “just draw names out of a hat” instead? Leave your suggestions below in a comment, and if your idea is the best, you’ll be the first (of dozens) to win a prize! Oh, and the prizes are defense sprays (duh), decontamination supplies and random electronic stuff that doesn’t suck!